Okay. So it's been ages since I've actually made a blog post. I started the day off with posting a lot of links to things I wanted to keep at hand. Those aren't what's up with us, just things I want access to without a hunt through the bazillion and one bookmarks I have.
In my last post in February, I noted that Lola was beginning to fall. She was. She fell twice; fortunately, no bones were broken that I know of . She had a sore spot on a hip, but no bruising there. Since no bones were sticking through skin, no bruising showed, and she could walk, I went with there's not much else to do. She doesn't move a lot anyway, so further hurt was minimal. After a couple of weeks, she said it wasn't painful anymore, and I think we're safe.
She has proven quite amenable to using the walker, and goes nowhere anymore without it. Before she was using a cane. Of all of my relatives which have driven family nuts by not utilizing aids, my mother has been absolutely wonderful about accepting aids when the time comes to use them. Thank you, Mama.
A few weeks ago when Max was here, we carried her rocker out of the living room and replaced it with the lift chair I'd gotten for Dad. He steadfastly refused to utilize it properly, and for him it was a total waste of nearly $700 dollars. For mother, it's been wonderful. We needed to remove the rocker she had been using and replace it with something that was steady and wouldn't throw her while using it to stand up.
She uses it to help her get up and to sit down. For the first few days she sat in it rather stiffly. Then something clicked, and she realized how nice it was. She uses it to raise her feet up to help with both comfort and swelling. She relaxes back into it when she knows she's nodding off, and I don't worry about her falling out of her chair during a nap. She curls up and gets comfortable while watching TV. So the $700 waste for one person has turned into a boon for another person. Sigh. What a result.
On the other hand, part of what I think has kept me from blogging for so long has been the decline in Lola. She has become almost incapable of getting herself up in the morning. What a change from the time when I finally took control of the TV remote because she was blasting me awake after 5 hours of sleep. She might get herself up one day out of five nowadays.
The rest of the days I have to roust her out of bed. Always she is spacey and looney. If I don't get her up by 1:00 p.m., she has been incontinent. I have to force her to get up, have to direct her to the bathroom, have to instruct her to take off her pajamas, clean herself, and put on the new pajamas. I have to strip the bed and wash the sheets, pee pads, and pajamas. The good in this is that she is still mostly capable of doing these things herself. If there's been a problem with a BM, I have to clean that up, and frankly, have to make sure urine is cleaned from all areas the diaper/incontinence pads touch. However, she can manage a lot without me doing every single thing. She finally manages to get to the chair in the living room during the time it takes me to strip the bed and get the wash started. Then I have to comb her hair and get her presentable for the day. If I didn't, she wouldn't care.
After all the madness with Joe, his personality and his dementia, I think the saddest and most hard thing for me to cope with has been my mother's demise of capacity. She has declined to the point that it's perfectly acceptable for her to pee in her bed and to lay there for hours in that pee unless I intervene. She hasn't fallen into dementia. She's just fallen into nothingness. Frankly, the last month of dealing with and accepting that has almost done me in.
I could rant and rave about Joe, but I still knew it was dementia accentuated by personality. Accepting that was part of the course. Accepting that my mother has stopped caring about laying in piss has almost done me in.
Who knows what's going to get us until we have to deal with it. This latest has almost stopped me in my tracks.